Lord of the....Porcelain Rings

Well, I've finally done it. Most say it's an impossible task, but I've accomplished it: I've finished reading Lord of the Rings. After 6 years of Tolkein, I'm finally done. Although it was originally written as a children's book, it was so detailed that it would make the most meticulous person's head spin at times. Maybe that's why it took me so long to finish it? Hardly.

Actually, I only read about 2-3 pages per day each time I picked it up. Maybe 5 pages at the most. I figured this way I could really get good value out of the book by absorbing it in slowly, without having to rush through things and miss any details. But also so that I could have the story last for a long time. One of the things I've always hated about reading books is that I eventually come to the end. After familiarizing myself with the characters and getting to know them, it's almost like getting to know a real person and then...that's it. No more. It's kind of sad, like saying goodbye to a good friend whom you've shared adventures and tough times with in a way. I know, strange but true.

But 6 years for about 900 pages? Well, that's 2,190 days to read 900 pages. That may seem like less than 1 page/day. However, I never read the book on days that I was constipated or if I used the bathroom at work. And each time I did read, it was only for about 10 minutes at a time, 15 if I was at a really good part of the story.

We all know that Goh is the true Lord of the Porcelain Ring, but if there was a steward that would be me.

Birthdays

Recently, there was an ABC News report on "Bank-breaking Birthdays" where parents spend crazy amounts of money on their children's birthdays. Well, we already know all that from watching Sweet 16 (for those of us who have cable TV - not me, can't afford it). But now it's progressed to the younger ages and children as young as 1 year-old are having elaborate birthdays that cost more than some weddings (well, cost more than my wedding, anyway). Let's analyze this.

One couple spent 50K on their daughter's first birthday. If they have the money for it and don't go in to a huge debt and make 5 million dollars/year, then fine. But if they're like most Americans who make the average salary of 40K/year, even with a combined income of 80K...are they insane? Is keeping up with the Jonses THAT important? In a word, yes. Obviously, it is. And again, if people can afford 50K birthday parties, then fine. But most people cannot, and they're doing it anyway. Nothing new, but stupid nonetheless.

HOWEVER, all this whining and complaining about $3/gallon gas, *I* don't make enough money, *I* should get everything for free (including healthcare) and someone else should pay for it, *I* don't want to pay taxes because *I* don't have any money is so inconsistent, it would make anyone unsympathetic.

"Can't pay your taxes? Too bad. Who told you to blow 50K on that birthday party and buy a 40K SUV and that 2 million dollar home when you only make 40K/year?"

The only exception to this is the cost of education. I do admit that education doesn't come cheap in this country and it's perfectly acceptable to take out huge loans to pay tuition. I think 30k/year for grade school is a little extreme, though.